Thursday, June 22, 2006

Apathy Jack writes:

So I'm standing by myself guarding the bags at Stage Challenge. I've just returned from a smoke-break taken by some of my students. I don't smoke, but I needed to do a bit of sleuthing to get to the bottom of the rumours we were hearing about them getting drunk at lunch time. I considered going the route of "not angry, just disappointed", but decide instead to go with "angry and disappointed". It works, and the kids walk back in muted shame.

I send them off to rehearse, to work out the kinks that have developed in their routine since they dulled their reflexes. Returning to the communal area where the Guidance Councilor and the Pastor are looking after our gear, I find that one of our lot has gotten stoned (well, more stoned) during the lunch break and had something of a meltdown. He's fine (for certain sluggish values of fine), but has managed to piss off one of our key players, who has disappeared. The Councilor and the Pastor go off to find him.

To alleviate the boredom, I go over the survey that teachers are given, asking such ludicrous questions as "How has the Stage Challenge® affected the fitness of the participants as a group?" and "How has participation in the Stage Challenge® affected the students' overall oral/communications skills?"

I reach the question that asks "How has participation in the Stage Challenge® affected the students' consumption of tobacco, alcohol and other drugs?"

After a while, I have to stop myself from laughing quite so manically, because the other schools are starting to stare...

2 comments:

Miss T said...

Does 'key player' in your teacher world = 'key player' in mine? As in when you know that you are having a relief teacher in so you can go to a seminar

"Key players* sit up the front, and I am choosing spies to watch you all and tell me EVERYTHING".

*children most likely to throw a chair

Apathy Jack said...

Well, in this context it just meant one of the stars of the show, but your definition still stands...